Lucia has something to say

Monday, May 07, 2007

Vulnerabilities

My long-time friend called yesterday. We are motherless, sisterless, daughterless women. So when she said. Summer. Her birthday. Chicago. I agreed instantly. To come. I understand. Birthdays (and Mother’s Day) in a motherless, sisterless, daughterless world. Motherless. In this I am vulnerable.

Kenya Air flight 431. Crashed leaving Douala. In a mountainous, heavily forested area. In a mangrove swamp. People from two dozen countries. Were aboard. Along with a sense of adventure comes risk. I fly Kenya Air frequently when in Africa. Because I consider it safe. And I flew out of Douala not so long ago, where the flights are often late, glad that we were finally leaving. And I can only imagine that these passengers thought the same on this stormy night. I have always thought that if I die while traveling, I will have been doing something exciting that I loved. Travel. In this I am vulnerable.

Half a thyroid. Is all I have left. I’ve been tired lately. A few weeks ago in the middle of a hike, I climbed onto the top of a picnic table. And fell asleep for more than an hour. I’m not on thyroid meds. And I need to see a doctor. Health. In this I am vulnerable.

I have been restless. Not traveling. And envious. Of a woman who is. Having adventures in Turkey and Georgia and Israel. In my strange life. I am leaving for a week in Belgium on Friday. For meetings. On the coast. In a town that guidebooks describe as the town not to go to if you’re vacationing on the coast. And I realize that any travel to Europe or Boston or San Francisco has fallen into the not-really-travel category. Excitement. In this I am vulnerable.

14 Comments:

Blogger St. Dickeybird said...

And your life grows to the point where what excites the rest of us is so regular as to not count.
Congratulations!
:)
Go see the doctor, and get back to the excitement.

7:36 AM  
Blogger jen said...

we are all vulnerable. it's the knowing that humbles us.

i've been thinking of you and your travels lately, and wondering when you are leaving again....because i, too, struggle with the allure of the domestic over the exotic.

9:12 AM  
Blogger meno said...

I can't really imagine a life in which traveling to Belgium would not be exciting. I am excited to be traveling to Chicago. :)

Please go see the Dr.

11:01 AM  
Blogger Mona Buonanotte said...

Thyroid meds are saving me in so many ways. That and iron pills. Seriously.

Take care of your cuteness, sister, and have a great time in Chicago!

12:12 PM  
Blogger QT said...

I haven't reached the point where traveling is not exciting - even when I go for short trips thru work.

Don't put off the doc too long - you might be amazed by how much better you feel on the right meds, sister.

Great post,BTW.

12:48 PM  
Blogger Susan as herself said...

Goodness. Get some medical help. I have a friend with that condition (or similar) and the meds really helped her. And she's a world traveler too. ;)

Coming to Chicago? Wheee! Look me up if you want---email me for my number if you have the time.

I promise not to be a serial killer!

12:49 PM  
Blogger Maggie said...

I was thinking that it takes great strength to admit your vulnerabilities. I hope you are feeling better soon.

2:11 PM  
Blogger KC said...

I agree that we are all vulnerable. In different ways.

I think your vulnerabilities make you you. I like you.

2:24 PM  
Blogger Tink said...

Vulnerability. Divinely human. Envied by Gods and Goddesses throughout time, legend, and lore.

2:36 PM  
Blogger jen said...

i came back to this, friend...because it stuck with me as one of your most beautiful posts. mostly because it was about you.

11:00 PM  
Blogger Rebekah said...

Lovely post Lucia.

Made me think of my own vulnerabilities...

Go to the doctor right now young lady!

11:48 PM  
Blogger Citymouse said...

i never would have know that you are vulnerable. for those of us on the outside, all we see is strength. But do take care of your health

6:56 AM  
Blogger gr said...

well, glad you share so I don't have to travel anywhere.
BTW-didja get that kayak yet?

7:32 AM  
Blogger kat said...

Great post. I love the way you write.

2:41 PM  

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